Monday, 29 September 2008

One step forward, two steps back

We had our appointment with the vicar at the weekend, who said the short answer to whether we could have the wedding ceremony in their church was no, but the long answer was yes, if we became members of the church. This entails going along regularly for 6+ months, and then signing up to be on their electoral roll.

Before starting the planning I never knew how complex the rules were on where you can marry and how, it's almost like they don't want you to get married in their church.

I had never really considered joining an Anglican church having been brought up at Baptist churches, but I really haven't settled at one in the 4 years we've been down here now. So we went along to the service on Sunday. I never thought, as a Christian, that it was going to be so difficult to sort this out, but it is absolutely fundamental that we do this bit right, otherwise what is the point of doing it in a church at all?

It is important for me to emphasise that we are not trying to find a church only for the wedding. There is no way I'm going along to a church for the next 18 months just for the purpose of the ceremony. How awful would we feel if we never went along again after that.

Having a church we both like and feel comfortable in is the most important thing, and I think it is necessary as the right grounding for this lifelong commitment we are making.

We liked the church service on Sunday, so we will give it another go and see if it seems feasible to settle there. There's not going to be any quick answers on this for a while. However, we probably need to start making the other arrangements sooner.

So I might go a bit quiet here until things are more settled and a bit further along.


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